20090527

FEELING GHOST-LIKE...

i've been moping around for two weeks now, feeling & looking ghost-like. nothing like heartbreak to adabrakadabra one's spirit...

heartbreak in your 30s is so different than in your 20s:
  • in your 20s, you cry for days on end, you consider never eating again, drinking only liquor and possibly jumping off a cliff somewhere... you're wondering who will hold your hand in the street, who you'll have sex with in an elevator, who you'll go to Glastonbury with, etc... you feel inadequate, "what's wrong with me?! what did i do wrong?!"
  • in your 30s, as i've just discovered, it's more of an aching feeling, a fear of loneliness, the loss of a life long partner - the face of the man i would marry, have children with, have grand-children with and grow old with is no longer. it's about keeping your integrity and your focus, and just putting the relationship failure down to bad timing. you don't feel inadequate.
if i were to use music to describe heartbreak in your 20s vs heartbreak in your 30s, these are the pieces i'd choose:

heartbreak in your 20s:



heartbreak in your 30s:


what has created this difference? me? society? evolution? hormones? please comment, i'm intrigued to hear your thoughts on this. consider this a sociological experiment.

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